Dismantling the 'I Don’t Need Help' Mentality: The Hidden Struggles Men Face.

From a young age, many men are taught to act and feel in specific ways—both positive and negative. Growing up, talking about feelings or understanding the "why" behind those emotions wasn’t part of the conversation. Instead, it was more about "stifling that shit" because there was no time for it. For many men, especially those who see themselves as the providers for their families or tribes, carrying the weight of responsibility becomes a given. We are expected to be the compass, the problem solvers. But what if that mindset is a double-edged sword?

On one hand, taking on this role has its advantages, but it also has significant drawbacks. Where do we go when we need guidance or mentorship? If we are the apex of our tribe, who do we turn to for help? As we age, we often become more set in our ways, stubbornly believing "I know how to do this" or "It’s my way or the highway." But how can we continue to grow, evolve, and provide the best for our families?

The answer is by constantly evolving—by staying curious, learning the "hows" and "whys," and pushing ourselves out of our comfort zones. The more we embrace growth and seek knowledge from others, the better we become. We lead better, love better, and ultimately, provide better. This is why I encourage men to seek out those with different skills and perspectives—because when we allow ourselves to be challenged and guided, it not only improves us, but it makes our families and tribes stronger too.

Finding mentors and taking the ego out of the equation is one of the most powerful steps a man can take on the path to self-improvement. In a society that often praises independence and self-reliance, seeking guidance can feel like admitting weakness. But the reality is, true strength lies in recognizing where we can grow and being humble enough to learn from others.

Mentorship provides something invaluable: a perspective outside of your own. No matter how much we think we know, or how confident we are in our abilities, there will always be blind spots—areas we’re too close to see clearly. A mentor, someone who has already navigated similar challenges, can provide wisdom that accelerates our growth. They see the pitfalls we might miss, the shortcuts we wouldn’t otherwise consider, and they help us unlock potential we may not have known existed.

Taking the ego out of the equation is essential for this process. Ego tells us, “I don’t need help,” or, “I’ve got it all figured out.” But those thoughts are what keep us stagnant. Growth demands vulnerability—admitting that we don’t know everything, and being open to feedback, critique, and change. When we’re able to set aside the pride that tells us to go it alone, we allow ourselves to receive the tools, knowledge, and accountability that push us forward.

Finding mentors who challenge us not only makes us better men, but also better leaders, partners, and fathers. We become more adaptable, more insightful, and more capable of handling whatever life throws our way. By letting go of the ego and embracing the idea that there’s always more to learn, we continually evolve and bring the best version of ourselves to those who depend on us.