If I Could Go Back 10 Years… I Wouldn’t Save Myself

People ask:

“If you could go back ten years, what would you tell your younger self?”

And I get why people love that question.

It’s tempting.

To think we could go back and erase pain.

Avoid the wrong people.

Skip the mistakes.

Change the outcome.

But the truth is…

If I avoided everything that hurt me,

I’d also avoid everything that built me.

Experience Is the Teacher

We don’t become strong because someone gave us good advice.

We become strong because life forced us to learn.

The highs that gave us confidence.

The lows that humbled us.

The moments that broke us open and showed us who we really are.

That’s where growth lives.

Not in comfort.

Not in theory.

In impact.

Some Lessons Require Pain

A parent tells a kid:

“Don’t touch the stove. It’s hot.”

The kid touches it anyway.

And no amount of warning can replace that moment.

Because some truths don’t enter your life through words.

They enter through experience.

If You Save the Younger You… You Weaken the Older You

That’s the part people don’t want to hear.

If I could go back and protect my younger self from every hard season…

I might feel better for him.

But I’d be stealing from myself.

Pain didn’t ruin me.

It trained me.

Mistakes didn’t destroy me.

They exposed my blind spots — and forced me to evolve.

The roadblocks didn’t “set me back.”

They built the discipline I stand on today.

What I’d Say Instead

If I could sit across from the younger version of me, I wouldn’t tell him:

“Don’t do this.”

“Don’t take that risk.”

“Don’t trust that person.”

“Don’t make that mistake.”

No.

I’d look him in the eyes and say:

Thank you.

Thank you for getting knocked down and still showing up.

Thank you for being imperfect and trying anyway.

Thank you for carrying pain you didn’t understand yet.

Thank you for not quitting.

And then I’d tell him the only thing he truly needed to hear:

Information Is All It Is

Good or bad — life gives you information.

That’s it.

What separates men isn’t the struggle.

It’s what they do with it.

Some let pain turn them bitter.

Some let failure turn them soft.

Some let setbacks become excuses.

But the disciplined?

They use it.

They learn.

They adjusts.

They grow.

I’m Proud of the Man I’m Becoming

I’m not perfect.

But I’m proud.

Not because I lived a clean life…

Because I lived a real one.

I’ve been tested.

I’ve been humbled.

I’ve doubted myself.

I’ve fallen short.

And I still refused to stay down.

Every scar holds data.

Every setback sharpened the blade.

Every loss forced a lesson.

And today?

I’m still here.

Still building.

Still becoming.

Final Thought

I don’t want to go back and save the younger me.

Because his struggle built the man writing this.

And I’m grateful for that.